It dawned on me many years ago that a simple lie would stop tedious conversations I didn’t care to have.
This sounds much worse than intended. It does. Let me give you some context.
A former advisor, co-worker, mentor & friend was obsessed with the movie Dirty Dancing. Instead of telling her I have never seen it, I always replied with a simple line I knew was in the movie:
I don’t understand the context but truth be told, it was just easier to lie.
I don’t want to watch the movie. I don’t want to understand. I want nothing to do with it… so when this topic comes up, I always reply with “Ahhhahahahahaa! Nobody puts baby in a corner!” and that shuts them right up.
But truth be told, I lie about this stuff all of the time. You see, I don’t really like people, and I don’t want them to try to convince to me to watch something I don’t want to watch.
This includes (but is not limited to) the following:
- The Devil Wears Prada (oh, Meryl is so incredible!)
- Actually, any movie with Meryl Streep (she’s unbelievable!)
- Pitch Perfect (Oh, that adorable Anna Kendrick! I love Cups!)
- The Godfather (Part II is a classic, but III is a waste of time!)
- Citizen Kane (Rosebud is his sled!)
- Gone With the Wind (I don’t know nothing about birthin’ no babies!)
- The Golden Girls (Oh, Sophia!)
- The Sopranos (it’s so smart!)
- Sex & The City (hahahaha! I’m the perfect gay for loving this show!)
I let a current co-worker read this before I published, just to make sure it made sense. Aliya got through the first few lines and screamed:
“What do you mean you’ve never seen Dirty Dancing?”
My point stands. Publish. Drop the mic, walk away.